PoorDecisions tagged as

aww what a drag dude

14

Really Awkward Mornings

 
Went to use a public toilet while wearing brand new woollen gloves. Took gloves off (no one wants dirty gloves, right?), rested them on the back of the toilet then sat down to pee.
Stood up and realised the gloves had fallen in the bowl and I'd peed all over them. Ruined forever.

37

Drunken Shenanigans

 
Went to go see my dad's lawyer after he died, about his will.
Dear old dad thought that his will was a good place to tell me that I have not one, not two but THREE illegitamate siblings (two brothers, one sister) from not one, not two, but three different women. Thanks, dad.

32

Arbitrary Numbers

 
Decided to become a musician.
I am poor.

-10

Metric Tons of Self Respect

 
went out to the bar on st.pattys day drank a shit ton of irish green beers and a few too many shots of jameson eventually had to take a massive shit went to the stall sat down and let it out then a big ass mother fucking meathead walks in and tells me.... get up..... i say im taking a shit u need to wait.... he comes in closer and says u need to get the fuck up right now..... as much as i drank this guy was looking super small so i said....... i told u im taking a shit u need to fuckin wait and pointed at him
at that time he took my head and smashed it into the wall and gripped me up off the toliet pants around my ankle and tried throwing me out into the bar....yea i got my ass kicked on the toilet isnt that some shit*

9

Miles per ROFL

 
Got a job offer from a company out of state doing I job I enjoy and pays 1 1/2 times what I make at my current job. So I quit and moved for my new job.
Got to the new state, talked with personell who had me take a physical/drug test. They said they would have my start date in a week or so. I signed a 6 month lease on a place to live. During that week the company "let go" of all the new hires and started a hiring freeze. They didn't call me to let me know. I moved halfway across the country to be unemployed.

37

Miles per ROFL

 
decided to cut habenaro peppers without gloves
a terrible surprise after i took a piss

27

Chairman LMAOs

 
sleeping with the sexiest coworker, hearing a tap at the window i decide to answer his door naked
his girlfriend of two years asking if i was there for her man or his brother....

53

Orders of General LMAO's

 
After getting in a fight with my girlfriend. I asked her if she was getting her period.
Slept outside in my car after being called a sexist pig, and thrown out of the house.

37

Broken Condoms

 
Geared my whole life around trying to be an author.
Can't even get anything published on this fucking website!

15

Claps from the LOLrus

 
attempting to contain chemical spill (i work in a dry cleaners)
hair falling out amd it takes significant concentration not to vomit. should probably go see a doctor



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